Recently i have some thoughts... i keep seeing so many good things in people that i really wonder why i cant be like them. Like i have a colleague who knows Jap language, lived in Japan for one year to work and study Jap (what an experience!), knows how to play piano, and a lot of the chinese instruments, good in mandarin, and english also not bad. Very confident lady. I wish i can be like her.. She is Ms BN, my real life idol recently.
Sometimes i will think in this way, if i am stuck in a crisis with this person, and only 1 person can survive, it really shouldnt be me. E.g. she is such nice a person, if she dies, a lot of pple will be sad. she has a bf, if she dies, it will be so sad.
Worse, sometimes i think in this way... when i die, what will people think and say at my funeral? And will there be many people who will cry and say they will miss me? I quite doubt so. But if i really die, i hope i have left some nice thoughts with my friends, and that i have made their life a little brighter. . . .
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